What is orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot

What do you get if you cross a centipede with a parrot?
A walkie-talkie

What do parrots eat?
Polyfilla

What's got six legs and can fly long distances?
Three parrots

How do we know that parrots are more clever than chickens?
Have you ever heard of Kentucky Fried Parrot?

A young magician started to work on a cruise ship with his pet parrot. The parrot would always give away the tricks saying things like, "he has a card up his sleeve" or "he has a dove in his pocket."
One day the ship sank and the magician and the parrot found themselves alone on a lifeboat. For a couple of days, they just sat there looking at each other. Finally, the parrot broke the silence and said, "Okay, I give up. What did you do with the ship?"

A young man's mother was now living a long way from him and he didn't get to see her as often as he would like. His father was no longer around and he felt saddened for his mother being lonely. So for his mother’s birthday, he purchased a very rare parrot, trained to speak seven languages. He made arrangements for a courier service to deliver the bird to his dear mother. After a few days he called.

"Hey Mum, what do you think of the bird?"

"The bird was good, but a little tough. I should have cooked it longer."

"You ate the bird? Didn’t you know it was a rare breed and was very expensive? It had a talent where it could speak seven languages!"

"Oh, excuse me replied the mum - if the parrot was so smart, why didn't it say something when I put it in the oven?"

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